A LOVE SUPREME

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Monday, April 21, 2008

Just shoot me

Last week I woke up with the dread that someone was trying to kill me. It was a feeling that I was being chased and pursued. Someone(s) was trying to shoot me. So, I was constantly on the lookout for snipers who would sink a bullet into my head. Who was trying to shoot me? I'm not sure, but I know they were Asian/Oriental. I'm thinking Chinese.

Do the snipers represent potential women interested in marriage? And do the bullets represent marriage and the death of me?

Is there a psychoanalyst in the house?

26 comments:

hoosier reborn said...

If assuming it is a potential bride, then in death there is life....

or it could be something you ate.

just came across your site-excellent insights and will be checking in.

samlcarr said...

You have to be more careful. That secret blogging in support of the Dalai Lama has been found out and you are now a marked man. Beware, that was no dream, 'they' really are out to get you.

Kevin Winters said...

That would depend: do you have a Chinese girl that you are interested in and she is interested in you? ;o)

Emily said...

I would say... look not only to your dream, but what happened during the day and specifically what your mind was resting on before falling asleep.

All of last week as I was in the state of waking up, I thought I was either working on a project for school or someone was telling me I needed to work on my project for school. Guess what was on my mind last week? Of course, this is much more obvious than female Chinese snipers.

Emily said...

Okay... I think you've got things a little backwards. Just b/c the Chinese are female doesn't necessarily mean they want you. You did say they shot specifically at your head, which houses your brain. They want your knowledge.
Those bullets aren't to kill you but to lodge into your brain, copying your knowledge of something (Eisenbrauns material?, theological insight?, other invaluable secrets?...) so they can benefit from it as well.

They might be Chinese due to the news, etc. And they're female b/c... you're surrounded by your own kind everywhere you go and your subconscious picked up on this, giving you some female variety in your sleep to make up for it?

That's my stab.

Melody said...

Too many Jackie Chan movies?

ktismatics said...

You comment on the dream shooters' ethnicity but you never explicitly say that they were women. Were they? Or is it women that came to mind after you woke up?

Jonathan Erdman said...

Correct, John!

There were no actual women in my dream. That was my interpretation!

No Jackie Chan movies, but a week or ten days back I watched some Gangster movies (one of my favorite genre of movies).

Kevin: no Chinese girls that I am interested in or interested in me.

I did have a new drink mix the night before: mojito and vodka.

ktismatics said...

More precisely then: were the shooters men, or genderless? The reason for asking, of course, is that guns and bullets typically refer to male apparatus, in which case we might be looking more at a homophobic interpretation. If the shooters were men or of indeterminate sex but in your waking state you transposed them into women, it might be a conscious defense against unconscious ambiguous sexual otherness and the fear it arouses: neither black nor white but Asian, neither female nor male but... something in between?

Jonathan Erdman said...

Ha! Interesting!

No, I don't remember the gender of the shooters. I just remember a fear of being shot at any moment by an unseen sniper.

Emily said...

Okay. I really think I've got it this time. It's quite simple. Politics (i.e. Hillary) was on your mind!

Come to think of it, I had to dodge a few myself a few nights ago at the grocery store. People are ruthless for parking spaces.

ktismatics said...

Hmm, yes, I see... You did associate these snipers with gender, and they were going to "sink a bullet" into you... And you feared that the target was specifically your head... however, you were being "pursued," presumably from behind...

I think what we need to work on, Erdman, is your fear of women. You have a sense that they're the ones with the guns, the bullets, the power, the control. But perhaps also you would like to be pursued, that you prefer to respond rather than to take the initiative. Did you have a gun in this dream, by the way? No, I thought not.

Any other thought come to mind? Anything at all? Don't be embarassed -- I won't tell anyone.

Jonathan Erdman said...

So, subconsciously I fear the male apparatus and hence the dream with guns and bullets and such. But then when I wake, I consciously make a switch and the shooters become female, which betrays my fear of women and my own insecurities (no gun) and fear of vulnerability.

Basically, I fear both men and women?

ktismatics said...

Doesn't everybody?

Summer & Nicole said...

You watched the Bourne movie 10 days ago. I really think that has something to do with it. . . and maybe you have a little guilt about your favorite part being when the girlfriend gets shot.

Matt said...

Maybe it is the second oldest in your family, trying to get you out of the way of inheriting the family fortune.

ktismatics said...

I like the sibling rivalry angle, Matt. "Family fortune" = affections of the parents. So who is the second son in this tormented family?

Matt said...

Under the circumstances I think it is best not to say.

Kevin Winters said...

I don't know: though it is true that guns and bullets are often related to male-ness, I've long come to the conclusion that the women really hold the power. For example, one girl that I am now pursuing captivates me by simply looking at me...then I get nervous, stammer over my words, can't think of things to talk about, all because I get lost in that gorgeous face...

Yeah, that's power... ;o)

chris van allsburg said...

Well, hell. I really did have someone threaten my life.

There's these white trashers living next to us occupying my widow neighbor's house while she tries to sell it, and I complained about their awful, growling, loud obnoxious dog that was scaring my daughter.

"Lovely dog you have there."
"I don't see what the big deal is."
"Well, it's loud and obnoxious, and it scares my daughter (she's 3 yrs old).

Big, fat lady smoking cigarette tilts head and shrugs shoulders.

I say, "Maybe I should kill it." I'm angry. Disrepect me, but not my little girl!

"Maybe I should kill you," she says.

"Maybe I should kill YOU," I say.

Then I started shaking, b/c I couldn't believe I said that. I don't ever want to hurt anyone. But, the tongue, as James says...

Talked to the husband. He said he's sorry. So did I. He said his wife owes me an apology. Still haven't gotten it.

"I'm sorry I called you crazy," my wife said.

Melody said...

Whoa dude, you started the death threats first. I don't know how mad you can get at this lady.

Was the dog properly restrained? If it was you're over-reacting anyway. People are allowed to have big scary dogs. If not, all you had to do is call the police or the humane society or something. Of course, you can't do that now because the first thing that's going to come out of the lady's mouth is "He threatened to kill me and my dog!" and that's just gotta be awkward to explain.

ktismatics said...

Sounds like the outline for a good short story, Chris: nice premise, nice pacing, interesting plot development. Write what you know, as they say. Maybe it ends right where it is now; maybe there's some ongoing ominous brooding and then it ends. Or maybe you go all Steven King and REALLY overreact (in the story, that is).

chris van allsburg said...

K--yes, it should be a good short story.

Mel--when someone cares not for the safety or well-being of my child, I get offended easily.

The dog, while on a leash, constantly growled and barked at us in tense, attack mode.

Yes, I shouldn't have said that, BUT--it's a dog. Humans are of greater value. Her threat was more serious.

We both said stupid things.

I have apologized, and still await for one from her. I think I hate white trash the most. Just thought I'd throw that out there.

Melody said...

Mel--when someone cares not for the safety or well-being of my child, I get offended easily.

Totally and completely understandable. But there's a massive difference between your child being scared and being unsafe.

chris van allsburg said...

Yes, and I really felt unsafe with that dog there. One break from it's lease and it could crash through the dilapidated, flimsy fense that separates us by a matter of feet. It also looked Pitbullish. So I was scared.

Again, I don't excuse my behavior. It was wrong to say that.

chris van allsburg said...

I immediately thought of Peter cutting off the servants' ear. At least I didn't do that, huh?